Healthy Relationships, Negative People, and Boundaries
Posted in Psychology
Sometimes successful relationships are just not possible. What do you do when someone around you is in-your-face negative? Do you have a strategy for these “inspiration suckers?” Well, I can tell you one thing you cannot do with them: escape. I recall one day I was overhearing a very negative and counter-productive conversation. Rather than get involved in it and possibly get the proverbial: “What do YOU think Damien?” I ran out of that area. I went to a new location and tried to forget about the vitriolic stuff I had just overheard.
In that moment, I saw an even more negative situation where a kid was actually being the negative, toxic one. I realized then and there that you can run but you cannot hide from toxic people and their negative energy. I struggled for a long time develop a strategy for handling these people. One day it hit me as clear as day: ignore them. Can anything you do make a prickly plant soft? When you let these people affect your inner peace, you encourage them in essence. By ignoring these toxic people, you take away their power over you and over others. Why not turn the other cheek and daydream of Argentina travel? Even a toxic person knows what a closed door means. If you ignore them long enough, they will move on. It’s been said before that sometimes a healthy relationship can only be saved by putting your mental health first and ending it.
I would love to be able to tell you that these people will one day not be in our society anymore but they always have been and they always will. Just ignore them. They may not go away, but they won’t take anything good out of you. Oh one more thing, did you ever hear about the lifeguard that got pulled down and drowned while trying to save a flailing, pannicking swimmer? Both people died because the lifeguard tried to embrace a drowning man. Don’t let negative people pull you under, let them drown you’ve got better things to do anyway. You’ll learn as much as a psychology course when you take the step.
Do you think ignoring negative people is the best approach?
3 Comments
It’s hard not to care though! I know what you’re saying, but it’s hard not to say something positive and try to turn their frown into a smile (which, with these types of people, is impossible). Actions speak louder than words though. We just need to act positive and they will see the difference. Hopefully.
katelynjane’s last blog post..7 Things.
thank you for this. I deal with a large number of negative people and this was very helpful.
Thanks that was very helpful. I will also change the subject, say I have to go if I’m on the phone or if I’m in the same room stop talking and make myself busy.
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