Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy (REBT) is arguably the first cognitive therapy. I’ve been a fan of cognitive therapy ever since I was introduced to it by a licensed clinical social worker in 1999. Got issues? It works. No, it’s not holding hands over the eyes of your partner like the picture shows, I just chose that one because I thought it conveyed closeness and safety.
Reckless emotions and “telling on” people and crying, all that has its place on a therpist’s couch (arguably), But REBT works you through the stuff that is holding you back more quickly.
I wanted to start dialog on this today since I feel it can truly transform your life at work, home, et al. I’m sure to bring it up again since I am that impressed with it for anyone and everyone. By the way, Presently, my wife and I are using it to put an end to some of our recurrent fight issues, and it is working. We are finding that some of our biggest “triggers” come from things that happened to us when we were kids and it is very relieving to be able to understand how to do things better. To feel better about the things that happen to you (even the bad stuff) REBT is worth looking into.
I must give credit to the creator of REBT, Albert Ellis. Mr. Ellis put together a system of cognitive therapy that has literally revolutionized my life, along with millions of others. Let me tell you what it is exactly:
REBT consists of a very simple acronym: ABC
A: This is the adversity that happens to you: boss calls you into your office and it doesn’t seem good, wife yells downstairs to you and it sounds really bad, you hear someone peel out their tires in front of your house and you hear a glass shatter … etc. These things are neutral in and of themselves, you don’t know what they mean right away.
B: This stands for what you believe based on a myriad of past learned experiences and attitudes. Mostly, it means what you have experienced relating to the “A.” If you have been a baseball player for years, a high speed object coming past you may not be as frightening as someone who has had ammo flying past them. Basically, this is how you see the “A.” REBT looks at this closely to determine if the A is really the sole cause of your emotions about it and not “B.” REBT works to remove the B. For example, let’s say your boss calls you into his office. You feel like you should get up and walk in, but something keeps you from going in. It might be because your parent once called you into their office for something negative. You may come to find the incident was only a positive thing.
C: This stands for consequence. As a result of behavior, there are inevitably consequences. Usually when people get to therapy, their C has not been positive.
The place to point in REBT is B: belief. What you believe about what happened must be separated from the true meaning of A.
Hmmm, when people told me I was doing a bad job, they always fired me after that. This could be an imagined belief. Therefore, my boss yelled at me so therefore I will be fired soon.
This is not necessarily the case and a responsible person who wants to live a life outside the funny farm will work to examine the b in light of a. The end result? Ellis actually calls the next step “D” which stands for DISPUTE of the previously held, if indeed held, self-defeating Belief.
The next time you get in a fight with your spouse or have any form of self-defeating thought, remember the ABC’s of REBT: A) Adversity, B) Belief, C) Consequence, and D) DISPUTE steps of Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy. Not only could it save your life, it could make it better than you dreamed possible.
*Works Consulted: Wikipedia, my own life, my own cognitive therapy sessions.
8 Comments
It sounds very interesting and I like the basis for it….the analogy of baseball players vs soldiers in terms of high speed objects really helps to illustrate.
It also seems fairly complex though and I look forward to reading your future posts about this topic!
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I have been in therapy for 16 years and I know that my psychiatrist uses behavioral therapies. I definitely think you post is useful and has made me realize why I sometimes stop and pause before I “over-react”. I used to live in drama, and now I just live.
Bobbie Dawn, I appreciate your comment. Some people live their life in mental pain because they don’t want therapy. Therapy is for smart people not dumb ones!
You probably learned about it briefly in psychology class, I know I recalled the term when I heard about it. But when you get the ABC’s of it it is a really cool mental template to take on unwanted emotions and triggers.
Good and valuable information. In college, having studied counseling and the theories until I could recite things in my sleep. Just kidding, but it became so much a part of me. Albert Ellis should only be credited as the founder of RET. Although his theory and approach included the B, it was never spelled out but implied. Several other psychologists after him added the B.
I actually got to meet Albert Ellis and be his “demostration patient.” He was not a personable or approachable person at all. He was quite gruff. I was told later that he is usually like this which kind of fits his theory which to me is very mechanical and is not very personable. Anyway, he is brilliant, but I would never want to be his patient; nonetheless, I had him autograph one of his books.
I know you wrote this a while, but I kept coming back to wanting to say something about it. By the way, this is the first time at one of your blogs and I am finding it interesting.
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Welcome. It takes a little more time to form my daily thoughts around the brain and psychology so it is nice to hear you find it interesting. Hope to see you around.
That is neat you met Ellis. Cool in fact! I met the granddaughter of Robert Frost and didn’t date her … it was like the road not taken ;)
Nice article, Damien. I agree that some of the biggest triggers can be things that happened to us as kids that have stuck with us. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is incredibly successful for a lot of things and it works!
Or it can be the way we react now through grooves we have learned as adults. For example, I interrupt a lot. That’s a cognitive process. I’m not much into the childhood trauma stuff. I’m usually like “get over it, you’re 50″ LOL. I do try to have compassion though.
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