Some of the most life-altering moments for me have been times when I got in trouble. You see, I’m a very stubborn individual who has patterns of thought and action that are hard to break. For example, when it comes to my marriage I am quite dense. My wife has been telling me for years that she wants me to surprise her with things. It just isn’t the same, she says, when she is “in on it.” She would like to be surprised and made to feel special once in a while that way and yet I can count on three fingers how many times I have actually done that in nearly 7 years. Now a few times she has really let me know she didn’t appreciate the way a birthday or a special occasion went down. One way to describe these time is that I “got in trouble.” Now no guy likes to be in the doghouse of course. I especially don’t because my wife is such a kind and giving person my guilt is exponential when I fail by omission. It is a difficult time for me when this happens and it’s something I should remember after it passes … not forget.
I won’t get into some of my other “get in trouble” moments through my life but I will say they have ranged from being in 4th grade and stealing erasable pens from a drugstore and getting caught to rough-housing too hard with one of my kids and having to take them to the emergency room. I’ve seen a LOT of failure as a dad, husband, 20, 30, and almost now 40-something in this sometime un-wonderful world. Each time I got in trouble I can remember calling out to God (I happen to do that from time to time because I am religious, pardon if that offends): “Please Lord, get me out of this one and I promise … never again!” Most the time up until recently, I mostly forgot about that after things equalized again. I’ve learned now the value of humility and the ways to stay in that mindset. Any of us could fall at any time in a variety of ways. The way I am avoiding it these days is by trying to remember each day the time I got in trouble. Been in trouble lately? Don’t forget about it.
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I will say they have ranged from being in 4th grade and stealing erasable pens from a drugstore and getting caught to rough-housing too hard with one of my kids and having to take them to the emergency room. I’ve seen a LOT of failure as a dad, husband, 20, 30, and almost now 40-something in this sometime un-wonderful world.
Wives and kids – hmmm – neither comes with an instruction manual. Lots of opportunity for you to “get in trouble” isn’t there? Well we are doing the best we can, and sure we screw up – humility calls us to learn and grow. I’ve found by being a better listener and trying to stay really present in the moment has made the whole journey of life somewhat easier. Its taken YEARS, and I’m still learning! I figure as long as I’m learning I’m not dead yet!
suZen
@suZen: That is an excellent comment. I especially like the idea of being a better listener.
I feel that getting in trouble is also ways on how we learn things. We learn to not repeat the same mistakes we made before. I’ve gotten in trouble with many things also, ranging from relationship reasons, to stuff that happens at school. However, I feel I have learned from most, if not all, of those mistakes and troubles and has made me become a better person. Getting in trouble isn’t always a terrible thing, it’s sometimes part of a learning process.
@Funny Freak: FF, I love your agreement that mistakes in like are sometimes our best friends! They teach us the right way to take. Whether we take it depends on whether or not we remember when we got in trouble.
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