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All people have some level of responsibility in their lives. For example, many dads in the world know they have a responsibility to work a job and provide for their wife and kids. If a dad refuses to do this, there are consequences. Now, some people have responsibilities that aren’t as visible but they are there nonetheless. To illustrate with the same example, if a dad doesn’t work a job, we might assume that he is doing the domestic job of dressing the kids, feeding them, and doing the Mr. Mom thing. And then of course, there are the sad sad folks who shirk responsibility altogether. The axiom here is that we are ALL bestowed with some measure of responsibility. Because you are human (I assume you are) you know what responsibility is and hopefully what your responsibilities are. Now, if you want to be an amazing visionary in the world:
I want to add another responsibility to your list: self motivation.
Your family, coworkers, and friends all rely on you to be motivated. Motivation is a non negotiable. Some people falsely think they “just aren’t the motivated type.” They leave the seminars and self-help books and “Postcards from the Funny Farm” subscriptions to the “Type A” personalities. They are sadly misled. We all need self motivation and the more sources the better.
If I feel myself getting upset about something like, for example, 9Rules.com denying my blog, (personal whining moment) I need to get over that tonight for the sake of my family. After all, my “down” over it is a pity party my family shouldn’t be forced to attend. But on a larger scale, there are huge things that get us all down every day. While it’s okay to feel sad or down sometimes, we should view staying “up” as our personal responsibility and goal. Do you think my 20 month old cares that some people said Dad’s blog isn’t good enough? How about my wife or my other two kids that want me to do fun stuff with dad like horsie rides and going out for ice cream?
I always put a caveat I never heard much of growing up or even in church either for that matter because it belongs in this discussion:
Some people have a chemical imbalance and cannot “snap out of it” when it comes to a bad mood. (ie; SAD disorder, bipolar, rage, depression) If you feel you fall into this category, get to your psychiatrist or psychologist. When you are stabilized, come back and read this post. This is a purely cognitive response. You shouldn’t blame yourself for not being physically able to self-motivate.
We owe it to our circle of friends, work, and family to self motivate. Start earmarking habits from mental exercises to buying your favorite ice cream. These habits should bring you up. It should be your responsibility to pull yourself up, not your family’s. In doing so you will experience incredible rewards being a leader in your circle and leading by example.
There are immense rewards to responsibility. I can tell you that one of the most rewarding is the ability to self motivate yourself. Ice cream on Balboa island always motivates me. Since 9Rules has denied my blog to be in their membership, I’ll need to make a trip out there soon … for a double scoop. ;) Let me give you the truth about this wholesale: Motivation is your responsibility.Do you have a favorite self-motivator?
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9 Comments
I hope my clients are reading this post.
My favorite self motivator. I use this particularly to work out, which I am dressed and ready to do at the moment, “just one more blog” .. but my favorite is to imagine / remember how I feel when I am finished. I feel so accomplished, so fresh, so full of energy and determination. I feel proud and healthy. And that usually / sometimes gets me moving.
ANd off I go!
@phd in yogurtry: Have a great workout and thanks for the awesome comment!
Self motivation is a great thing, being motivated by others helps achieving one´s goal. But, to motivat oneself is another story since it remains most of the time, on others.
However, it is a good thing to talk about, it motivates me for the moment, for example!!
motivated???!!!!!!!!
@Uma Traummann: Uma … it is a different thing to talk about self-motivation. Thanks for continuing the dialog.
Damien,
I am glad that you choose to include the caveat about depression due to various forms of mental illness – a critical point which too many motivational speakers appear to have a tendency to gloss over.
In previous times, when I have experienced periods of unemployment, I operated on what a call the 80/20 rule, a rule under which I allowed myself to feel down and depressed approximately twenty per cent of the time, but forced myself to maintain an upbeat attitude for the vast majority of the time.
I do feel that it’s important to allow oneself to experience a variety of negative emotions for short periods on some occasions. This, I feel, helps us work through whatever negative emotions which we are feeling, and to get them out of our system.
But whilst being down is OK, staying down permanently is another thing altogether, and I feel that it’s important to be able to pull ourselves out of our mental slump when the time is right.
One technique which I used during periods of unemployment was to have some key positive words which I would say whenever I needed a lift. One such word was ‘active.’ When I needed a boost, I would say this word out loud, and it would serve as a queue to remind me that I was not about wallowing, but instead was about taking constructive action in order to rectify my employment situation.
Self-motivation is certainly key to push yourself out of a black hole, but sometimes circumstances prevent you of doing just that. Professional help can be just the right thing to stop from falling into depressions.
@Andrew: Great comment.
@Richard Wohnung: I agree Richard. Professional cognitive therapy can be life-changing for the good.
When it comes to self-motivation, I have to think of a sentance a old boss told me: Everybody has some very strong charateristics / attributes, find the thinks you like and you are better than the most of the people and focus on that. And for me it was self-motivation, which I think is a good one :)